Hospital stay

I don't read ones this long, but you can...

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Subject: Hospital stay
Date: January 11, 2009 11:38:25 AM PST
It is post surgery day 5 today, so I thought I should write a brief note to tell you all what is happening.

I was one of the scariest things in my life being wheeled into that operating room last Tuesday and saying goodbye to Rosie. Than God the surgery to this point seems to have gone well. As you probably know I was fortunate to share a room with an absolute fabulous man of my age who turns out to be a weekend neighbour of Sally and Eric. Over the next few days we shared our pain, out delusions, hallucinations, comments about the food with humour. We both know that that is all passing stuff and we were only concerned with following doctor’s orders and getting back to our homes as soon as possible. One note of reassurance is that the decline in our hospitals is much overstated at least in the areas that I saw. I saw efficiency, professionalism and caring There were a few stupid aides or nurses but you quickly learnt who to trust. Fortunately I was able to be discharged on Day 3 which was the day that they had said I might be able to if all went well. Ken who had surgery a day after me was hoping to leave Saturday or Sunday.

The goal was to get home but then comes the challenge..stairs, beds, toilet seats, bathtubs, seats etc. Well our house looks something approaching an old person’s home. It is sad to come to realization that while we all know we are getting older we don’t feel it and so deny it. When you are wearing a hospital gown open at the back with your butt showing walking with a walker..you know it

The good news is that I am much more mobile and the walker stayed in the hospital. I don’t need any aides to walk but I will be using the walking poles daily on the Ambleside seawall starting tomorrow. 5 mins out 5 mins back increase by 30sec a day. Not exactly kneeknacker training. But I am going to be a good patient and follow doctor’s orders.

Yesterday was my first day at home. While most of it was good I had some very very bad times. I appreciate visitors but not those that appear out of nowhere in disguise, Chinese African Moroccan taking me to Marakkesh Mars and beyond every time I closed my eyes. Now some people may like this but I was freaking out. Thank God for Rosie. Her calm approach as she turned the pages of her way too interesting book ‘Let’s have a cup of tea’. This was right and eventually that they were knocking at the wrong house. I stopped taking the pills that they were offering me and am now down to just a few Tylenol 3 s a day. If Rosie had not been here as I had suggested I would have gone crazy.

Now I am on my own completely as Rosie has gone on a short course. For a couple of hours.

I want to say thanks for all your support. It made a huge huge difference. This has been a life changer for me. I hope more adventures but I am going to cut down on the challenge side of things

Feel lucky that while this was major surgery it should put me back in good health. Many others are not so lucky.

Love XXXX

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RE: Friday

And once you are on the sad chain, you don't get off it.
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Subject: Re: Friday
Date: January 15, 2009 1:03:28 AM PST

Sending Barb' some flowers is a lovely idea, and I'd like to chip in please, Helen.
Thanks for the CD, XXXX.
See you tomorrow evening.
Sx

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Friday

This one is sad.

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Subject: Friday
Date: January 14, 2009 1:13:08 PM PST
Hi all,

I saw Barbara tonight and she was as you would expect considering the circumstances - resigned, busy, stoic, honest.

Funeral is a week on Friday and she asked whether we would mind moving the rehearsal night to the Thursday before. I said that we really didn't expect her to rehearse the night before her dad's funeral but she said she enjoyed it so much it might take her mind off it a bit.


Upshot is, she is expecting to join us this Friday 16th and I said I'd get back to her about the other. Personally I think we should go ahead as agreed this Fri (and Barbara will come along if she feels able) and although she thinks she feels able to do the Thurs and I would like to rehearse if I thought it would help her, I feel she will probably find there are other things to focus on - organising, relatives phoning, looking after her mum, that sort of thing. We can always have a band prac on the Fri to get our beginnings and endings sorted.


Thoughts?
HX

PS I would also like to send her some flowers next week - if you'd like to chip in and send it from the Whaas feel free.

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FOR JOEL FINAL COURT DATE

Off the bat, you would think this email came from a man. Wrong.
Apparently this woman is Joel's Mom. I think Joel is grown of age.
I feel for all three of them. Most likely they could use a bit of counseling. (Maybe quite a bit.)

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Subject: FOR JOEL FINAL COURT DATE
Date: October 25, 2008 9:26:04 AM PDT
I REALLY CANNOT STAY BEYOND THE 26 I have tickets to be in AR for a JOB something Joel wouldn't understand what the fuck that is.

I can come a week before I don't see any reason is being there more than that, Joel will be gone, sleeping, trying to introduce me to some whore, wont do anything I want and come in so fucked up if he makes it home (all the while I loose sleep) waiting for someone to try to kill me, you or him because he HAS FUCKING PISSED EVERYONE AND ANYONE HE COULD OFF BY STEALING EVEN 5 dollars from them.

The original dates you had settle out are the dates I can come if not then I guess THIS LIKE EVERYTHING OTHER SINCE HE WAS 14 AND WITH YOU WILL HAVE TO GO OFF WITHOUT ME = only thing that I played any important in was his birth and raising him until you felt you could and boy howdy talk about fucked up!

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FW: No Subject

The one I got, was the response, I included the whole thing. None of them are me.

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Subject: Fwd: (no subject)
Date: September 21, 2006 1:35:09 PM PDT
Thanks for you E-mail it really means allot to me. Not having a great time today as crew tracking has been not on my favorite list.
I have done something today that is bothering my conscious now...


I QUIT I quit my job....


xxxxxxx,

Scared because this today is a day that I kinna terminated,...

Michael and my life with him.

i will be back sunday just because things where plan that way here.

I miss home for what that is today and smile to have you there.

Luis




Begin forwarded message:
From: Txxxxxxxx2@aol.com
Date: September 21, 2006 9:53:57 AM EDT
To: lxxxxxx.xxxxx@mac.com
Subject: (no subject)

Luis,

All is well here. I am glad you feel good about our friendship, because I feel the same way. You are a great guy and never let anyone take that away from you. You have had a few ups and downs recently and needed someone to be there for you, and I'm glad I was able to be the one. It felt strange that you were not here last night. I missed having someone to talk with. It was funny this morning DJ sat outside the door to your room waiting for you. I guess he misses you too. I hope you have a great day and I will talk to you later today.

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David's Surgery

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Subject: David's Surgery
Date: August 10, 2006 10:56:06 AM PDT
David is scheduled to be at the University Hospital at 2:45 P.M. on the 10th. Supposedly the surgery will be about 3 hours long, recuperation time at the hospital 2-3 days. Josh, Becky and Kiersten are all here with us. (Tim reminded me that SOMEONE has to "Do the work of the Lord", so he's covering that for all of the rest of us!)

Thanks so much for praying for David at this time. Please pray that whether the surgery corrects the problem or not that we will trust God and His goodness.

Jennie

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A favor

Not meant for me...
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Subject: Re: a favor
Date: July 24, 2006 2:08:51 PM PDT

Hi "my first name",

I hear you guys had a real nice time. Dad says you were really nice to him. I am glad he had a good time. Hope you did too. At first I was bummed I could not go, but when he said there was an hour wait, I thought well, it was not so bad not going.

OK, here is the favor. I was with grams on Sunday. After the visit from Mike and Dave came too, she and I talked over lunch. She has been looking over her life. She was talking about, yes your brother, he comes up once in a while with she and I. In part of the conversation, she mentioned she would have like to get to know Dan's kids. I offered for her to see them through a variety of ways. She has declined to see him because of he and me not seeing each other. I offered for you to take her to a resturant, or me take her and the children could be there. If I took her you could perhaps be there with the children and she could 'see' them. She has declined on all accounts.

I finally asked if she would like some current pictures if I was able to arrange that. She finally said that would be nice. I think she wants to 'share' the pictures of her great grandchildren withg her friends. I think she is reexamining her life as well. What was, what could have been....

My brother came by today on his way home and they will be stopping by grandma's on their way home, and we had a detailed discussion about her. In looking back over the past months, or year or so, she is in a decline. This is it, she will not be better than today ever again. I have pretty much been oblivious to it and now need to address it in a way that is full of the love I feel for her and not the frustration I am sure will come.

So, here is the favor, finally. Could you perhaps get current pictures of Nic and Emma? A picture of the two of them together would be good, or pictures of them individually would be alright too. I am not sure what your relationship is with Dan at the moment, so if it requires you to do ANYTHING you would be uncomfortablel with, please do not do it. Beckett willl be a big part now and as he becomes more active she will have him to show off as it were. Please do not do this out of any kind of guilt.

Thanks "my first name", love mom

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Homeless

My mail inbox goes back to 2005, so I'll grab from there for a while. At some point I'll fire up my old email program and see what I have kept from before then.

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Subject: homeless
Date: July 26, 2005 3:45:04 PM PDT
Hi XXXX,

Wow, you're homeless. I'm sorry you went down again so rapidly.

When we last talked last you said you'd call me back about the furniture I had for you and possibly helping you out in other ways. When I didn't get a call back I knew something bad was happening.

In any case, I'm in much the same situation. They hired an African-american woman with less experience over me at work and reduced my hours. I can see why they did, even though she doesn't have as much experience. There's no female African-american women anchoring on XXXX. In doing so, they reduced hours for freelancers! I'm toast.

One of the questions I have is how I would get you some money. I don't have a phone number for you and I don't have an address, other than the P.O. box in Honeydew. When I do get a few dollars I can send you, how about I deposit it directly into your bank account. I would think this would be faster and easier than sending you small amounts to Honeydew through the mail. What's your account number and mailing address you use at your bank? They'll want to know that when I make a deposit.

Again, sorry to hear about your continued bad luck,

Henry

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Henry sounds like a nice guy.